Log in

No account? Create an account
Musings of an irreverent kook [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]

[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ archive | journal archive ]

(no subject) [Oct. 14th, 2008|11:17 pm]
[Current Location |Bangalore]
[mood |cheerfulcheerful]
[music |Baawra Mann - Hazaaron Khwahishen Aisi]

You know you are in love when you feel all romantic listening to a beautiful song and your lover interjects with a "Can you turn that off? He sounds like he's crying!", you begin to laugh and look at him fondly.

Its raining in Bangalore and I'm huddled under a blanket editing a crappy update on the financial markets. Life is the same six months into marriage. It's as if we segued into this life. I have a new job, we spend weekends sleeping, and I haven't missed home yet...

Have started reading K M Munshi's Krishnavatara. It's a fascinating read and I'll have to savor it on the weekend to do it justice.  
link2 comments|post comment

(no subject) [May. 17th, 2008|12:10 am]
[mood |awakeawake]

Move to Bangalore the day after. Packed all my stuff.  Waiting for A to finish his bath and coerce him to sleep coz he's driving to blore. Damn, I can't join him now, but the next time, come torn knee cartilages, I'll go with him. Its sad to pack all bags and then realize that one set goes tomorrow and the next later.

Am peckish now. Will nibble at olives. Gnight world. See you in a few days.

Oh, by the way, I'm a housewife now. Please expect stories of domestic disasters and culinary masterpieces.
link3 comments|post comment

(no subject) [Mar. 31st, 2008|05:05 pm]
[Current Location |My other home]
[mood |cheerfulcheerful]
[music |The radio - U, Me, and Hum]

I got married over the weekend.

Sounds prosaic and everyday like, and the truth? It was. We pulled off a 3-day cross-cultural wedding with about 475 people and neither A nor I was nervous. On the contrary, we enjoyed every minute of it :-) Many asked me in the run-up to the wedding if I was tense or excited or if I had butterflies. But how could I? I was marrying my friend and we had planned this together. I was entering a house where I had spent a good part of the past two years. I was being accepted into a family that had absorbed me long ago, what me attending random functions and parties without A. After the pooja yesterday, in the night, we raised a toast of Cointreau to a successful wedding. Tonight we’ll crack open the champagne. Yes, there could be no butterflies. I simply moved my clothes to a new house :-)       

link12 comments|post comment

LiveJournal auto-post [Sep. 3rd, 2007|12:01 pm]
A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin.

An idealist is one who, on noticing that a rose smells better than a cabbage, concludes that it will also make better soup.

It is now quite lawful for a Catholic woman to avoid pregnancy by a resort to mathematics, though she is still forbidden to resort to physics or chemistry.

Moral certainty is always a sign of cultural inferiority. The more uncivilized the man, the surer he is that he knows precisely what is right and what is wrong. All human progress, even in morals, has been the work of men who have doubted the current moral values, not of men who have whooped them up and tried to enforce them. The truly civilized man is always skeptical and tolerant, in this field as in all others. His culture is based on 'I am not too sure'.

----------H. L. Mencken
link2 comments|post comment

Runaway [May. 28th, 2007|01:24 pm]
[mood |coldcold]

So tired that I couldn't even sleep
So many secrets I couldn't keep
Promised myself I wouldn't weep
One more promise I couldn't keep

It seems no one can help me now
I'm in too deep
There's no way out
This time I have really led myself astray

Can you help me remember how to smile
Make it somehow all seem worthwhile
How on earth did I get so jaded
Life's mystery seems so faded

I really don't know how I, the one who was prepared for anything, got myself into this. Trapped, check. Tired, check. Want to run away, check. Alone, check.

I don't know. I just don't. I thought at some time the tears would stop. That they would dry out. But they just don't.

And I never learn.    

linkpost comment

I am an egomaniac - Part deux [Mar. 28th, 2007|08:44 pm]
[mood |awakeawake]



1. Love or lust?
With the idiot, lust for the next 24 years, after that I'll settle for love. With anyone else (given my pessimism), lust again!


2. What is personally more important to you - mercy or justice?
Mercy. Too many people are rigid, self-righteous, and quick to judge. To be human is to be able to forgive. Plus mercy empowers you. You get a better perspective of life. Justice can make you bitter.

3. Do you vote? Why/ not? 
Yes I do, simply because the words of my Civics and English teachers are dinned in my head: "a vote makes you responsible for the state of society, by proxy, because you elect the said regulators of society".

4. What do you do when you are depressed to feel better?
I cry, have a massive fight, fly to Bangalore to make up, and get happy again :)

5. If you had children, what values of yours would you really wish that they also believed in? What of your vices would you not want them to have?
Hmmm...I'd want them to be curious and generous. As they grow I want them to see the world not as black and white, but splotches of grey and pink. I want them to be passionate about their studies, work, love, and politics. I want them to be morally sound (Some things are unacceptable. Cheating on a partner ranks high). I have no vices, other than my propensity to eat mounds of potatoes :) Now, that is one vice I want my kids to have! 

link3 comments|post comment

I too am an egomaniac [Mar. 24th, 2007|12:43 pm]
[mood |amusedamused]

The rules of this meme are:

1. Leave me a comment saying, "I too am an egomaniac."

2. I respond by asking you five questions. You will answer them, because you like talking about yourself.

3. You will update your LJ with the answers to the questions.

4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the post.

5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.




1. Which of these relaxes you - reading a book or listening to music? 
Reading a book

2. Would you rather be a working woman or a home maker, and why?
 Hmm..I don't mind being a home maker, depending on the circumstances (eg if I have a kid, then I'll be a home maker for at least 5-6 years).

3. Would you like to settle in India or abraod, and why?
I'd rather be in India. I've lived abroad for a few months at a time, and I always the brown faces round me. I guess it's about feeling alienated.

4. If you would not have been in your current career, what alternate career would you have had? 
This is my alternate career! I studied to be an engineer :)

5. Do you read each and every entry on your friends page in LJ :P? 
 Yes. More so since my company hasn't tumbled upon LJ as bannable.

link3 comments|post comment

(no subject) [Jan. 30th, 2007|11:35 am]
[mood |draineddrained]

How do I forget. No, really.

Death says in Soul Music, "The human mind is like a cup. When it gets full, old memories flow out and new ones pour in." Or words to that effect. He joined the Foreign Legion. Where do I go?

Water flows under the bridge. The quality, quantity changes. But what happens to the bridge? It stays, eaten millimetre by millimetre away. It stands solid but can anyone see its tears?

I write bullshit.  

link1 comment|post comment

(no subject) [Dec. 11th, 2006|05:45 pm]
[mood |passionate]

"In War it is as it is in Love,” said Pertinax. “Whether she be good or bad, one gives one’s best once, to one only. That given, there remains no second worth giving or taking.” 

- Rudyard Kipling
link3 comments|post comment

Choose.. [Dec. 9th, 2006|10:07 am]
[mood |blahblah]

How do you choose? Or is the choice even left to you? The path that you have chalked out, where you have drawn the pitfalls, where the end is necessarily a happy ending.

Last night, I dreamed about a different life. Not better nor fancier, just different. It looked a lot like the life I'd pictured when I was twenty. Five years later, I'm different. I can see that everytime I react to situations. There was a time when I could be nonchalant. Indifferent, even. I would stand like a rock against the teeming mass that went one way. The rock would transmogrify into a centipede and crawl the other way.

Now the need is primal. Savage. A need that transcends to the time the circuits were wired to survive, not think. A time when procreation and desire took over "I don't think I'm ready for commitment. And if there's no commitment, sleeping with him is just so primitive, no?"

It's a new day. One where I don't know if I will sit outside me and watch Aditi throw a sulk and sit gloomily by her window, or if Aditi and I will be one and go over each minute of the past five years. One where I don't know if I will watch the parrots and crows swoop past me or if I will stare at the clay birds hung on the window.

Bah. The weeping and introspection gets to me. I think I should just cut everything and start again. At least I wouldn't feel I was at the edge of a party, waiting for the invitation to join in. I can see those frigging lights and smell the heady perfume, but I can't dance in there, dammit! 

Perverse. That's what it is. Someone up there is having a good time yanking my chain. We'll have it out when I get there, my lord. It will be a day of reckoning, in more that one way, I promise.

Never mind me. I'm drunk at 10 in the morning and not a drop of alcohol has passed down my throat.

link5 comments|post comment

[ viewing | most recent entries ]
[ go | earlier ]